If I had a dollar If I had a dollar give give give it to If I had a dollar give it If I had a dollar give give it to a If I had a dollar give give give it to a well well If I had a dollar give it to a well well If I had a dollar give it to a well well If I had a dollar for health care give it to well well give it to a If I had a dollar give give it to a well well give it to a well give it to a If I had a dollar So this car from Jersey cruises by and the kids come around all the time throwing bottles and screaming “QUEER! QUEER!” so this car cruises by and we all saw it and this kid leans out the window and says “Suck my dick!” My friend flipped him the finger and says something and all of a sudden the car slams on the brakes and five kids come piling out the doors and start kicking the shit out of my friend. For the next ten minutes about a hundred guys came out of the bars and from around the corner and they’re surrounding the five guys beating the shit out of my friend–his friend took off right away and later my friend found out that he’d just run home, didn’t bother calling the cops or nothing. And all these guys crowding around watching five guys beat up one guy and none of them said or did a fucking thing. My friend said they’re stomping on his chest and legs and breaking a lot of his ribs stomping on his head and his chest. At one point he gets up, he could hardly feel them hitting him and jumping up and down on his head and arms and legs. He finally said he remembers jumping up plowing through the crowd and running and running and running and running. The kids chased after him but he ran faster and faster passing through the streets and out of the neighborhood. He kept running until he collapsed on a side street. If I had a dollar give it to a If I had a dollar give it to a If I had a dollar give it to a well give it to a If If I had a dollar to spend for health care give it to a “If I had a dollar to spend for health care I'd rather spend it on a baby or innocent person with some defect or illness not of their own responsibility; not some person with AIDS” says the health-care official on national television and this is in the middle of an hour-long program of people dying on camera because they can't even afford the limited drugs available that might extend their lives and I can't even remember what this official looked like because I reached in through the tv screen and ripped his face in half. And I was diagnosed with AIDS recently and this was after the last few years of losing count of the friends and neighbors who have been dying slow vicious and unnecessary deaths because fags and dykes and junkies are expendable in this country. “If you want to stop AIDS shoot the queers” says a governor in Texas on the radio and his press secretary later claims the governor was only joking and didn’t know the microphone was turned on and besides they didn’t think it would hurt his chances for reelection anyways and I wake up every morning and I wake up every morning and I wake up every morning in this killing machine called america and I’m carrying this rage like a blood-filled egg and there’s a thin line between the inside and the outside a thin line between thought and action and that line is simply made up of blood and muscle and bone and I’m waking up more and more from daydreams of tipping amazonian blow darts in “infected blood” and spitting them at the exposed necklines of certain politicians or government health-care officials or those thinly disguised walking swastikas that wear religious garments over their murderous intentions or those rabid strangers parading against AIDS clinics in the nightly news suburbs there’s a thin line a very thin line between the inside and the outside and I’ve been looking all my life at the signs surrounding us in the media or on people’s lips; the religious types outside st. patrick’s cathedral shouting to the men and women in the gay parade, “You won’t be here next year - you’ll get AIDS and die ha ha…” and the areas of the u.s.a. where it is possible to murder a man and when brought to trial one only has to say that the victim was a queer and that he tried to touch you and the courts will set you free and the difficulties that a bunch of republican senators have in albany with supporting an antiviolence bill that includes “sexual orientation” as a category of crime victims there’s a thin line a very thin line as each T-cell disappears from my body it’s replaced by ten pounds of pressure ten pounds of rage and I focus that rage into nonviolent resistance but that focus is starting to slip the focus is starting to slip my hands are beginning to move independent of self-restraint and the egg is starting to crack america america america seems to understand and accept murder as a self-defense against those who would murder other people and it’s been murder on a daily basis for eight nine ten count them ten long years and we’re expected to pay taxes to support this public and social murder and we’re expected to quietly and politely make house in this windstorm of murder but I say there’s certain politicians that had better increase their security forces and there’s religious leaders and health-care officials that had better get bigger fucking dogs and higher fences and more complex security alarms for their homes and queer-bashers better start doing their work from inside howitzer tanks because the thin line between the inside and the outside is beginning to erode and at the moment at the moment at the moment I’m a thirty-seven foot tall one-thousand-one-hundred-seventy-two pound man inside this six-foot body and all I can feel is the pressure all I can feel is the pressure and the need for release. Well give it to a If I had a dollar well if I had a dollar give give give it to a well well